Excuses for Laziness

This post, well it doesn't really have much to do with my life or being a mom, but it's something I have an opinion on - and those of you that know me know that I love  to voice my opinion. :)

The other day while watching the Today Show, there was this woman - a mother - who had made a documentary about education in our country. The entire base of the documentary was that we are asking too much of the kids in the country, and putting too much stress on them. That we should go easier on them and require less. And I was shocked to see the amount of support this film got. Really?! I mean, I'll be the first to admit that there are definitely flaws in our educational system. For example, I have a younger brother called Tanner, but his first name is really Matthew. And his Spanish teacher was failing him because she didn't have any of his assignments. In truth, he'd handed in all of his assignments, but written his name Tanner on the top, instead of Matthew. This woman didn't know my brother at all! She had no idea that Tanner was really Matthew, so she clearly never spoke to him. (I'm also left wondering why she wasn't pondering why she had all these extra assignments for a student she thought she didn't have.) However, I don't think that over-work is a problem in our schools.

I went to High School at a private school in South America. I did eight hours of homework a night. I would take a nap at midnight and have my dad wake me up at 1 so I could get up and finish my homework. However, I was working to graduate a year early, so in order to get all my extra school work done I had to work eight hours a night for my normal work so that I could have eight hours on Saturday for my extra work. And it was stressful, yes. Super stressful. But it prepared me. When I went to college, the work load was so much easier that I was able to get all my work done, work 2-3 jobs at a time, and maintain a B average. In High School, I was still able to hang out with my friends at least two nights a week, I was a member of Modern Music Masters, I took Voice Lessons, I had monthly musical concerts, and I was in several High School Plays. I never felt like I was missing out on a social life. I still went on family vacations, and I still found time for leisure reading. And I never did homework on Sundays. Which leads me to ask, "If I was able to maintain a normal life with an enormous work load, why is it so impossible to believe that American teens can maintain a healthy, active, social life, with an infinitely smaller work load?"

I feel that rather than asking too much of our children, we are asking too little. Our culture is forever getting grief for being lazy - and for good reason. We have such a sense of entitlement and superiority, but we don't really deserve it! I was a nanny for a boy in Italy. Kevin was 14, multi-lingual, and went to school 6 days a week - as did all the other kids in Italy. He still had a healthy social life, he played on a competitive basketball team, and he found plenty of time to watch TV. So if these kids, in other countries, can spend more time in school, and still have a healthy social life, why is it so difficult for our children? I think it's because we've trained them to feel entitled to perfection without any work. We and they feel they should get straight A's while only dedicated a couple hours to homework a week.

In addition, our country's test scores are already awful in comparison with other countries. Do we really feel like teaching our kids less, and requiring less of them will help them in the long run? In this age of easy travel, and international communications, it could only hurt our nation's children to train them even less than we already are. They will be ill-prepared for jobs, or for interacting with their international peers. We will be further isolating them, rather than helping them to branch out and grow.

In an International Test covering Math and Science scores between millions of students in 41 different countries, the following were the results:

In short, the tests showed U.S. fourth-graders performing poorly, middle school students worse. and high school students are unable to compete. By the same criteria used to say we were "average" in elementary school, "we appear to be "near the bottom" at the high school level. People have a tendency to think this picture is  bleak but it doesn't apply to their own school. Chances are, even if your school compares well in SAT scores, it will still be a lightweight on an international scale.

1. By the time our students are ready to leave high school - ready to enter higher education and the labor force - they are doing so badly with science they are significantly weaker than their peers in other countries.
2. Our idea of "advanced" is clearly below international standards.
3. There appears to be a consistent weakness in our teaching performance in physical sciences that becomes magnified over the years. ( http://nces.ed.gov/pubs99/1999081.pdf)

One of the arguments of this documentary is a girl who committed suicide because she didn't get an A on a test. Another is kid's who get migraines because of the stress. Perhaps it's our approach? Teaching children that they're better than their international peers, expecting them to be the best, yet also telling them that they shouldn't be expected to work more than they choose. Training them that things should come easy to them. Then being surprised when they don't know how to handle to pressures of working. 

So in short, I don't think we're asking too much of our youth. If they're stressed, let's teach them the value of time-management, stress-management, and hard work. If the educational system is failing, let's re-organize it. Let's require a higher standard of lesson planning and teaching. But if we continue to teach our children that their problems are the fault of others, that it's not fair, and they're just being worked too hard, we're just setting them up to fail. Over and over. 

Craft #1: Hairbows - SO EASY

So we've all seen these. (INSERT PICTURE). They're adorable. And my daughter hardly ever goes without one in her hair. I love playing dress up, and putting pretty flowers in her hair. Luckily, my mom and sister made a lot and gave them to me before E was born. But recently I've realized that she's missing a few colors, which makes it difficult to dress her in those colors, because if you don't have a hair-bow to match, what's the point, really? And while her hair is long enough at 4 months to do a pony on her head, bows are easier. So I made a few. Here's my first tutorial.

You will need: (INSERT PICTURES)
Fake Flowers of your choice
Hot Glue Gun

Rhinestones or buttons for your flower center

 Hairbow Clips

1: Buy a fake flower of your choice at Micheal's, Hobby Lobby, or your craft store of choice. I prefer the ones with lots of layers, and that are wider, instead of the tiny ones for hair-bows. They usually range from about 50 cents to 5 dollars for one. Depends on your flower.

2. Pull/cut off the stem, and pull apart the flower layers. Then stack your layers. Make sure they are askew, so all the petals aren't exactly lined up. I don't use all the layers, but it's up to you. It's your flower!

3. Put a dab of glue between each layer, and glue together.

4. Hot glue your rhinestone or button in the center.

5. On the back of your flower, put a dab of hot glue, and place your metal clip on the glue.

6. Congratulations! You're done! Wasn't that ridiculously easy?! And people sell these things for over $5 each! Clip onto a headband or directly into hair, and enjoy!

Tilapia

How do you cook it?

One day my hubby came home, and said, "I like Tilapia! I had it tonight and it was so good!"

So my ears pricked up, because I'm constantly trying to figure out what to make for dinner. And I bought some Tilapia. And cooked it. And then I cooked it another way. And another way. And another way. And each time, he was polite, said it was good, but he clearly wasn't enamored with it like he had been when he'd eaten it elsewhere. Now, finally tonight, I had a mild success. He was happy with the way it was cooked, and enjoyed it, which I count especially as a victory, because he wasn't feeling well tonight. And things never taste as good when you're feeling sick. So here's how I cooked it tonight, but I want to know your recipes for Tilapia too, because I'm still looking for the recipe that will WOW him.

Place Tilapia fillets on hot skillet (heat on medium-high to high). Fillets may be either frozen or fresh. Let it sear for a couple minutes, then pour some orange juice over the fillets. This un-sticks them from the pan. Add some soy sauce, a small bit of mustard, and a tiny bit of pepper. Stir. (All ingredients are to taste. So just add them until you like the way it tastes.) Cover and continue to cook fillets in this sauce until they're cooked through. Flip them once or twice. They'll be done in a matter of minutes. You may add some corn starch mixed in water to thicken the sauce. Serve over rice. The sauce is great to pour over the rice too. SO easy. And ingredients that almost everyone already has. Awesome right?! So what's your favorite recipe?

Christmas Songs: Yay or Nay?

Now I realize this is a bit controversial, and probably frowned upon, but I do not like Christmas Music in general. People seem to assume that this means I don't love Christmas. But that's not so. I ADORE Christmas. Especially now that I have a child, and get to see Christmas through the new, excited eyes of a child. It's probably my favorite holiday. I love turning on the lights on our tree, and just staring at it. I love looking at the presents under the tree, even though I know that none of them are for me. But I can't wait for my hubby and daughter to open their presents. I'm just so darn excited!!!! But I don't like most Christmas music. I'm sorry people, but new songs are written every day. New number one hits come out once a week. So why tell me why are Christmas songs always the same?!?!?! The only thing that changes are the people who sing them!!! I'm sorry, but after hearing "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" four different times, but 4 different singers, in a two hour period, on the same radio station, I want to shoot myself in the head! However, there is one Christmas song that I will always love. Well, no, that's not true. Some artists can slaughter this song. But this song almost always touches me, and overwhelms me with the Spirit of Christmas, and the sanctity of this holiday.

O Holy Night

Also, I recently discovered (as in yesterday) a new Christmas song. I realize the song isn't new compared to most songs, but in comparison to other Christmas Songs, this one may as well have come out yesterday. And I appreciated this song. I appreciated that it's a new Christmas song, but still reverent, and focuses on the Christ child, who is the reason we celebrate this beautiful time.

A Baby Changes Everything

And lastly, to end this rant against Christmas music, with more Christmas music (I know. Even I don't understand how my mind works) is a beautiful song by Amy Grant. I have always admired Mary, Mother of Jesus. My favorite scripture is Luke 1:37, when the angel comes to tell her that she will be the Mother of hte Son of God, and she asks how this can be, and the angel tells her, "For with God, nothing shall be impossible." I cannot wait to ask Mary one day how she felt, and I often wonder what life was like for her. I would love to hear the Christmas story from her point of view, and I think this song probably accurately describes how Mary was feeling.

Breath of Heaven

A Poor Man's Pacifier

 

E used to be a Binky Baby. She loved her pacifier. From day one she would just suck on that thing, and it made for instant happiness. She required her binky to go to sleep, and it helped her stay calm in the car and grocery store. However, about a month ago, she just stopped taking it. For no apparent reason. She just started spitting it out. We had no idea how to calm her anymore. We had to find completely new strategies, because now, the binky just aggravated her. So we've had to improvise to find new things to entertain her. We've tried toys, books, teething rings, but the most successful things have been the most random of household junk:

Aluminum Foil: While my sister in law was highlighting my hair, E was getting quite fussy, and after she'd refused her doll and a rattle, my sister in law, Emily, handed her a piece of tin foil. INSTANT satisfaction. And a good 15 minutes of peace and quiet until she dropped it. So yes, now, when E is being stinky, I hand her a ball of tin foil. She loves to chew on it. Sounds like it would hurt her tooth, but she loves it. Does this make me a bad mom? Maybe. But it makes my baby a happy baby.

Plastic cups: She loves these red plastic cups that we have. Loves them. If ever I'm eating a meal, and she's getting fussy, and I want to finish eating before she explodes, I hand her an empty, plastic cup. This buys me a minimum of 10 minutes.

TV Remotes: They make great chew toys, and interesting things happen when you bite the buttons! This lasts as long as she can go before she changes the channel on me, and I have to take it away to get back to my show.

Plastic Bags: These are, of course, a no-no. But she sometimes snaps them up for a few seconds before I can stop her, while we're unloading the groceries.

Jewelry: Particularly necklaces. They're like rattles that can't get away! Plus they make delectable chew toys! My necklace often means a minimum of 15 minutes of "reverent" play time during Sacrament Meeting.

Tags: On most of her toys and dolls, E's favorite accessory is the tag. It's so smooth and fun to chew on. Tags equal at least 7 minutes of quiet, happy, play time.

Ribbons: Tags at their very best! Today my mom and I were wrapping Christmas presents, and Elena was sitting on the floor, frantically grabbing every spare bit of paper, trash, and tape. Naturally we kept snatching them away, until, finally she happened upon a long bit of ribbon! Bliss. Pure bliss. Believe it or not, this made for more than an hour's worth of productive mommy time, and happy baby play time. SCORE!

Lastly, Anything Mommy Has at the Moment: this is almost always her favorite toy and greatest need. Notebooks, pens, phones, anything mommy is holding.

Have a Little Laugh

"Oh THAT'S what you meant!"

Before I became a mom, I got all sorts of advice and warnings:
"You're going to be more tired than you've ever been in your life."
"Get used to wearing grungy clothes, because you're always going to be getting messy."
"She's going to get into everything!"

And at first, I thought to myself, "Ha! Joke's on you suckas! My baby rocks! NONE of those things are true!" However, I recently realized, they just weren't true, yet! As a newborn, E slept soundly, and I was well rested. She typically only woke up once a night. I woke up way more than that to go potty when I was pregnant, so waking up only once made for some great sleep!

Getting clothes dirty? Not really. I frequently would hang up her clothes and mine at the end of the day to use again later. She wasn't a spit-uppy baby, so she hardly ever spit up on her clothes. And what with just eating milk, she hardly ever got her clothes dirty. And since she hardly ever spit up, my clothes hardly ever got dirty either.

And she didn't get into anything, obviously, because she couldn't move herself around. So I didn't have to worry about hiding sharp objects, or putting away the computer cord....

And then came the Fifth Month... 

She isn't sleeping! Why won't she sleep people?! I have done everything humanly possible! Seriously, if you leave a comment with a suggestion on how to get her to sleep better, I will cry. And then find you. And make you cry. We do baths every night before bed. We use the lavender bedtime soap.... ugh, for more info, see the previous post on her sleeping. I have never been so tired. Oh my gosh. I almost have to prop my eyelids open with toothpicks. And when she wakes up in the morning, is it terrible that I just lay her next to me in the bed and let her wiggle quietly for 15 minutes until I can muster up the energy to get up?

Messy! I've recently started giving her rice cereal before her bedtime bath. Now, one of her favorite things to do is blow raspberries, and she thinks it's even MORE fun to blow raspberries right after I've put a spoonful of rice cereal in her mouth. Which equals rice cereal all over my face and her clothes. She also wants to be big and independent, and insists on holding the spoon herself. So I have a spoon, and she has a spoon, and we're both trying to get them in her mouth... mess. And she likes to bang her spoon. Oh, and put her hands in the bowl. And hold the bowl. So goodbye to the days of recycling clothes, and hello to bigger, more frequent loads of laundry.

And she now, does get into everything. She is learning to scoot and crawl, and while she's still moving mostly in a backward motion, she can also turn in circles and pivot while on her tummy, so she can get almost anywhere now. She just had to turn around and scoot backwards. I find her chewing on the computer cord, books, anything that's been left on the floor, that is not meant for babies - that's what she goes for. She'll scoot right past her ball, her doll, and her links, and head straight for my shoes, mouth open wide, eagerly anticipating the taste of rubber and dirt in her mouth. (I suppose when all you eat is milk, any variety in taste is welcome.)So now on to learning to baby proof the house.

I understand now. This is what they all meant. The advice and warnings just came too soon. I celebrated too soon.....

Don't let this fool you. This picture was taken, pre-mess